Thursday, October 30, 2008

How to turn good wholesome fun into something perverse

The Disney Princess saga continues...

I heard back from the Disney Princess Party company yesterday. They wanted a photo of me and my resume. I hope I'm qualified for the job!

I think this job would be good fodder for my future book. Remember when David Sedaris was one of Santa's Elves? Or maybe that would make me seem like a copy-cat. Regardless, it would ensue in many many jokes, and God knows I need all the laughter I can get.

Last night Matt and I went to his cousin Del's house to carve pumpkins. I think my pumpkin looks pretty bad-ass!

I do like pirates, but I admit that one of the reasons I chose that design was because the bones looked phallic. hahahah.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

I have applied for over 65 jobs. I have only had two interviews, and NO OFFERS. Among those jobs have been library positions, newspaper jobs, coffee shop jobs, etc etc. But, tonight I think may have either found a great job or sunk to a new low.

Tonight I applied for a job to dress up as a Disney Princess and entertain children at birthday parties. When I first saw the advertisement I was skeptical, because it could have been a sneaky way to advertise a stripper job. This is the first sentence from the ad: "Looking for females ages 19-30 to play Princess Character Entertainers for parties."

Sounds strippery, right? But read further and it says "Role entales, reading to the children, taking pictures with them and entertaining them with danceing and games.

I was immediately turned off by the bad spelling, grammar and punctuation, but I was sold at this part: " pay for 1 hr visits is $35 and pay for 1 1/2 hr visits is $45."

I normally charge $50 an hour for "dancing," "entertainment," and "games" at parties, but kids don't have as much money as adults, so I'll let it slide this time. I kid, I kid.

Now the question is, what Disney princess do I look like?

Answer: NONE!! Maybe I could be a villain for some twisted kid throwing a Disney Villains party. I could be Cruella, the evil-stepmother/sister (I do have big feet), Ursula, Malificent, or maybe I could borrow Christine's Jaffar outfit from Halloween 2004.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Snow (Hey-Oh)

Little C is now back in Utah, but here are some photos of our adventures.


On Saturday, we went to the Etsy craft fair. If you don't know what Etsy is, I encourage you to check it out. It's an online site where people can sell their handmade items. Most of the stuff at the fair was overpriced, but there were some cool items. C and I have an Etsy store, but currently there are no items in it.







Later that night we went to the Blumenthal theater in downtown Charlotte to see one of our favorite authors, David Sedaris. He was really funny, and I think Cait had a good time. While we were at the event, Matt went to his grandparents' house to "help" them try out their new margarita maker.





On Sunday we went to the Southpark Mall, a big mall in Charlotte. The highlight of the trip was getting a soft pretzel. hahah.

Monday, we took the Jetta to get an oil change (fun for everyone), and planned on visiting the museums, but apparently they are closed on Mondays. But, we did get to see some freaks protesting Columbus Day. They had signs that said things like "Columbus and his men killed thousands." I was like, "come on you guys. That was like 500 years ago. Pick your battles."

On Tuesday Caitlin and I headed to the beach. We stopped in Columbia on the way to say hi to Russ and Dustin, then made our way to Folley Beach, which is near Charleston. We picked a perfect day--it was 86 degrees and sunny--but unfortunately forgot our bathing suits. While we were sitting on the coast, a stupid wave came up and destroyed my cell phone and camera, which pissed me off. It came about 20 feet closer than the other waves, and was the only wave to do so. I'll chalk it up to a freak accident, but I was still angry.



Wednesday we laid out by the pool at our apartment, and did some crafts.

I don't have photos for the rest of our week, because my camera was ruined (the pool photo was taken with Caitlin's phone) and C hasn't emailed me the photos yet.

We finally got to visit the museums on Thursday. First we went to the Mint Museum of Art. In case you didn't know, there used to be a US Mint in Charlotte, but it ceased operation after the Civil War. The building which used to house the Mint is now an art museum. I really liked the costume exhibit, but it made me angry that they had a Fendi fur coat dragging on the ground, dangling off a mannequin's arm. I think it should have been properly displayed! The art museum also had a cool Andy Warhol exhibit with a lot of his portraits and still life fruit prints (or whatever you want to call them).

After that, we went to the Mint Museum of Craft and Design. C and I both liked the jewelry exhibit, and we took advantage of the museums' hands-on craft and made brooches. I have to say that Caitlin's brooch made of paper, pipe cleaners, paperclips, staples, beads, and pom-pons was pretty sweet.

Friday was the best day for photos, because we decided to find the Blue Ridge Highway, which is allegedly one of the most scenic drives in the country. We went to Blowing Rock, NC, which was a really cool city.

This is what we would have seen, if there hadn't been a thick fog everywhere. But, it was still really beautiful with the fall colors, and we could still see for quite a while.

From Blowing Rock, we traveled to Boone, NC, home of Appalacian State University. Boone is a college town, and it had some really great little shops and restaurants. I want to spend a weekend there. We went to this store, which sells handmade items, and I got a mug for Caitlin since she'd been looking for a cool mug during the week.

After we got back from our drive up north, we went to Jim and Nick's, a barbeque restaurant. Caitlin thought this was cool, because she knows a pair of twins named Jim and Nick.

Then, in true Matt/Brianna/Caitlin style, we went home and watched an episode of The O.C. on DVD.

I'll add some photos of our drive to Blowing Rock/Boone later!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

feel your boobies

Since this month is Breast Cancer Awareness month, I decided to make the blog pink. I hope everyone likes the pink puggie banner!