There is an unwritten rule that you must give your young nieces and nephews the most annoying gifts you can think of for all holidays and birthdays. The joys of annoying gifts are twofold: a) you get to dole out sweet revenge on your siblings, and b) it makes you popular with their offspring because annoying toys are usually fun.
Characteristics of annoying toys include (but are not limited to): toys that make loud noises, toys with intricate parts that only adults can figure out, crafts that encourage messiness, toys that move (including robots and remote controled toys), toys with flashing lights.
Here are some examples of past annoying gifts:
1. When my brother was young, our Aunt Robynn gave him a fire helmet with two annoying characteristics. It flashed brightly and had the loudest and most annoying siren. Kelby loved it, my parents hated it. I'm pretty sure they took the batteries out. Annoying gift score: B+ (because it wasn't so annoying without the batteries).
2. For our niece's third birthday, we gave her a princess outfit. While that gift seems innocent enough, she was starting preschool the next day, and Matt said, "You should wear that on your first day of school!" She didn't want to take it off, and tried wearing it everywhere. Annoying gift score: B-.
3. My mom gave my cousin Lauren a drumset when she was four. Enough said. Annoying gift score: A
Characteristics of annoying toys include (but are not limited to): toys that make loud noises, toys with intricate parts that only adults can figure out, crafts that encourage messiness, toys that move (including robots and remote controled toys), toys with flashing lights.
Here are some examples of past annoying gifts:
1. When my brother was young, our Aunt Robynn gave him a fire helmet with two annoying characteristics. It flashed brightly and had the loudest and most annoying siren. Kelby loved it, my parents hated it. I'm pretty sure they took the batteries out. Annoying gift score: B+ (because it wasn't so annoying without the batteries).
2. For our niece's third birthday, we gave her a princess outfit. While that gift seems innocent enough, she was starting preschool the next day, and Matt said, "You should wear that on your first day of school!" She didn't want to take it off, and tried wearing it everywhere. Annoying gift score: B-.
3. My mom gave my cousin Lauren a drumset when she was four. Enough said. Annoying gift score: A
4. In the early 90s, my Aunt Lani and Uncle Rod gave us an original Nintendo. The Nintendo was great fun (and still is), but was always a point of contention. Many fist-fights were started because there were three children, but only two players. To this day Caitlin blames her lack of video game skills on Kelby and I, since we never let her play. Annoying gift score: A-
5. I was the recipient of the best annoying gift: a keyboard with a microphone and tape deck. I'm sure my parents regretted giving me the gift the moment I learned how to play Backstreet Boys' songs and decided to write my own versions to annoy Caitlin, who loved BSB. I'm sure somewhere in my parents' house there is a cassette tape with my breakout hit, "I'll Never Make You Fart," a cover version of "I'll Never Break your Heart." The keyboard made a comeback last Christmas, after Caitlin and I had a few cocktails. It's the gift that keeps on giving--the gift of beautiful music, that is. Annoying gift score: A+
This Christmas I put the "annoying toy" notion aside, and tried to focus on getting fun toys that the kids will enjoy--bonus points if they happen to be annoying.
The Playskool Busy Ball Popper was listed as one of the best toys for our niece Kirin's age group, so I took a look at the reviews.
One parent said, "The music is annoying and loud. I would describe it as high pitched anime characters saying "yeah" over and over. The music actually stresses me out, and the balls flying everywhere stress my boy out."
5. I was the recipient of the best annoying gift: a keyboard with a microphone and tape deck. I'm sure my parents regretted giving me the gift the moment I learned how to play Backstreet Boys' songs and decided to write my own versions to annoy Caitlin, who loved BSB. I'm sure somewhere in my parents' house there is a cassette tape with my breakout hit, "I'll Never Make You Fart," a cover version of "I'll Never Break your Heart." The keyboard made a comeback last Christmas, after Caitlin and I had a few cocktails. It's the gift that keeps on giving--the gift of beautiful music, that is. Annoying gift score: A+
This Christmas I put the "annoying toy" notion aside, and tried to focus on getting fun toys that the kids will enjoy--bonus points if they happen to be annoying.
The Playskool Busy Ball Popper was listed as one of the best toys for our niece Kirin's age group, so I took a look at the reviews.
One parent said, "The music is annoying and loud. I would describe it as high pitched anime characters saying "yeah" over and over. The music actually stresses me out, and the balls flying everywhere stress my boy out."
I immediately put it on my shopping list. One kid down, one to go.
One of the reviews said: "The only complaint I have ever had about this toy is that there is no way to stop the music once you press the button; you just have to let the tune finish."
Perfect! I think this will be the best Christmas ever.
3 comments:
Ok you mentioned some of the favs, but forgot Kel's jet fighter (and the duct tape over the speaker) Cait's laughing baby, the harmonica (remember Mr. Bojangles)and who could forget Brianna's "vocal solos" to various Christmas tunes.
What about all of those messy toys? Remember the paint spinner? and the sand in the jar? and the fimo clay? and the tiny beads? and the glitter glue?
I just have to say this is a great point, although as a parent I would have to say that I HATE annoying toys. The problem is I can't quit buying them for my own daughter. Once the batteries die I don't replace them and then talk her into getting rid of them because they don't work.
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